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It is so important to take care of yourself spiritually, physically and emotionally. We all know this but sometimes it is hard to know where to start! In this post, I will share how to create a self-care routine that sticks without feeling overwhelmed!
First, you need to re-evaluate your current situation and ask God to show you if you need to change anything. Second, you need to create a self-care routine that is easy to maintain.
A few months ago, I spent 5 days in hospital; it had been my second surgery in 3 months. I started my recovery journey at home and began healing well and once I was able to get up and move again, I felt amazing.
Soon, my regular routine of Homeschooling, Parenting and Work began again…and then it happened, I ended up with a back injury and was stuck in bed for another 4 days!
When I told my friend about it, her exact words were – “Can anyone say Spiritual attack?!”
She was right!
The enemy is trying to break me!
He is trying to stop me from doing what I’m doing for the Lord!
There was a major revelation: every single activity that we are a part of brings glory to God and is furthering the Kingdom and Satan doesn’t like it!
Another thing that I noticed is that, even though it is great that we are building new relationships, attending regular activities and living our lives to the full, there hasn’t been much room for Self Care for Mum!
Mum was doing too much! I was too busy! I was overworked!
My schedule didn’t involve enough time to rest and all of a sudden I had no choice but to rest and stop. During my recovery from my surgery and being on bed rest with my back pain, I was forced to re-evaluate my own self-care routine and embrace the rest.
But…that was difficult because I wanted to be up doing our regular activities with the kids.
I felt…
..like a failure and I was in pain – physically, emotionally and spiritually.
The struggle of physical pain and it was affected me each day. No matter how much I tried to shift my focus, I couldn’t shake the negative feelings.
A couple of months ago was Resurrection Sunday. As we reflect on this special time and the Easter Story of Jesus’ crucifixion and resurrection, I want you to be reminded of the life He intended for us.
John 10:10 reminds us that the enemy wants to steal our joy but Jesus came so that we can have life, and have it abundantly. He didn’t die on the cross so we could live feeling defeated, helpless, stress and overwhelmed.
Yes, we will struggle with these feelings from time to time, sometimes, more than we would like. We need to be able to recognise that this is an attack from the enemy – those negative feelings come from him.
He wants us feeling defeated, overwhelmed and stressed!!
How can we overcome these feelings? As I mentioned at the beginning of this post, you need to re-evaluate everything in your life that is causing you to feel stressed and overwhelmed.
And….create a self-care routine!
I had to realise that I needed to start focusing on my own self-care more – it’s not being selfish, it is essential. As Women, Mothers and Wives we need to take care of ourselves so we can take care of others.
We need to make some tough decisions but we also need to understand that God is in control.
The hardest decision I had to make was to stop Homeschooling – I didn’t want to feel like a failure. I didn’t want to feel like I was giving up on my kids but I felt God saying, “It’s okay, trust me. Let go of the fear. I am in control.”
So, we have decided (after 2.5 years) that it is time for the kids to go to school. Our 2 eldest are going back to school but our 2nd youngest will be going to school for the first time, and our youngest will be going to Pre School.
A decision was made to re-evaluate all the activities that we do. Now that the kids will be going to school, we will no longer have 6-7 groups/activities that we travel to each week – it was just too much and was taking its toll on me, unfortunately.
Your response today is to be intentional in taking actions steps in your self care as part of a regular daily routine so that you can be better equipped to handle the stressors in your life.
AND…please re-evaluate everything you are doing – you do not need to do it all!! And even those activities that you think, “I can’t drop that one!”…yes, you can take a break from those ones too if it is necessary.
For example, I have joined a new gym in order to get access to the group fitness classes I enjoy and it is 30mins away form home.
My physical health has been suffering and I really need to put that at the forefront right now. I have decided that I will no longer be going to my regular Bible Study Class; I will not be joining the new Bible Study Class that I wanted to…instead I will be going to the gym.
Now, this is where it gets tricky because this goes against everything that we think we should do…”You’re dropping Bible Study and Fellowship for Exercise???”
This is my truth and this is where I need to be in my journey right now. I have Daily Bible Study, Prayer and Devotion every morning so I am not neglecting my spiritual relationship with God. (You can read here about 7 ways to start your day with Jesus.)
Now I am actually doing exactly what God wants me to do, He wants me to take better care of myself, physically and that will help me spiritually and emotionally.
Is there something in your life that may need to change but it is hard for you to accept?
Remember, God is in control and it is okay for you to step back a bit.
I’m sharing my story with you today to encourage you to let go of the
control and trust in the process.
If you need to stop going to that Bible Study, or stop being on that Committee, or stop serving in the kids Ministry, or stop saying, “Yes” to everything, I am here to tell you that it is okay!
You should do what you feel led to do and do what is going to be right for your self-care.
Too often, we put our needs second and is exactly why we end up burnt out, stressed and overwhelmed: this is why you need to create a
self-care routine!
Self-Care is not just about mani’s and pedi’s. You need to create a self-care routine that ensures we are taking care of our holistic health – physically, spiritually, emotionally and mentally.
An example of Self-Care in each area would be:
Physical Health: Eating a well balanced diet.
Spiritual Health: Daily Prayer.
Emotional Health: Journaling.
Mental Health: Talking through your problems with someone.
Incorporating these things into our Monthly Schedules will ensure we are taking care of ourselves. Keeping a Journal is great for keeping track of these things!
When you create a Self-Care Routine, it means that you need to decide what you need and when you are able to do it.
For example, if you know that you need to see a Professional Counsellour to work through some problems then you need to do it. Set aside time to attend appointments and start the healing process. Put it on your Calendar so you can be reminded of your appointments.
I enjoy getting my nails done so I know that every month, I go to the Nail Salon.
I need to plan ahead and set aside a time for myself to do this when the kids are at school, or on the weekend when my Husband is home to take care of them.
Note to Self*** Do not try and take a toddler with you to the Nail Salon!! LOL!!!
Regular exercise should be included when you create a self-care routine so have a plan in place for when you will exercise and how long you will need – working around the kids (if you are a Mum) is sometimes one of the main reasons women do not get enough Self-Care.
In The Free 4-Day S.O.S. Self-Care Challenge you can get a Free Self-Care Calendar that is full of Self-Care Ideas, one for each day.
Another part of your self-care routine is Homemaking!
It may seem that they are not related but they definitely are – you should be keeping a clean and tidy house. Think about it, if your home is cluttered, messy and unorganised you will feel stressed and overwhelmed.
We have an Online Course that will be released soon called De-Clutter Your Home, Clear Your Mind: The 7-Week Solution to Regaining Control of your Home and your Emotions. This course can help you if you need support in that area. **Information Below**
One of the 8 Steps in The Health and Honour Guide to Feeling Fabulous is “How to Prioritise your Self-Care and Gain a Positive Self-Image”. The more you take care of your self, the more your self-esteem will grow and you will begin to feel fabulous. I talked about this on my FB Page HERE and shared some great tips and advice on how to implement this.
Reflection is a very important part of a Self-Care Routine and is best done, either first thing in the morning or at bedtime.
Journaling can really help you recognise the things that are working for you and the things that are not and just spending time alone, writing down your thoughts, is a great Self-Care technique.
Keeping a Stress Diary/Journal is a great way to be able to recognise and reflect on your triggers and responses to stress. Once you are able to identify what triggers a negative response in you, you will be able to learn some strategies to learn how to handle stress in your life. You can get the Self-Care Stress Diary for Free when you join The Free 4-Day S.O.S. Self-Care Challenge.
Creating your own Self Care Survival Kit is another great tool to use. Fill a box with your favourite Self-Care items from the five senses – sight, sound, smell, touch, taste.
For example, some items I have in my Kit are sugar-free candies, a peel-off mask, colouring books/devotionals, scented candles, kinetic sand and lip gloss.
This idea came from Jenna Drew Dancy and I absolutely love it – Click here to watch the FB video about the Self-Care Survival Kit and check the images below for a sneak peek at my Kit.
Coffee Catch Ups with friends and family – it is crucial for you to have a social life so spending time with others is a necessity in life.
I know it is easier for you to isolate yourself from others when you are feeling stressed, tired and overwhelmed but it is not healthy. And sister, you need a break too!
Netflix!! LOL! Lay in bed and binge-watch Netflix for an hour or two but there is only ONE RULE when you are doing this: YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO FEEL GUILTY!!
The washing can wait, the dishes can wait, the kids are fine, the bills can wait, work can wait (if you are your own boss, that is lol). It is okay for you to lay in bed, or on the couch, for a couple of hours and watch a movie or your favourite TV Show.
As far as I’m concerned, it is a crucial part of Self-Care. Just don’t stay there for a week! Lol!
Women are always thinking about the To-Do List and everything that needs to be done so the Lord has instructed us to take time out and Be Still, on a regular basis – no matter what that looks like!
Did this post help you learn how to create a self care routine?
What are your favourite Self-Care ideas?
I’d love to hear from you!
Until next time, please Take (some Self-) Care!!
Love and Blessings,
Kala xx
my self-care survival kit
join the free 4-day
s.o.s self-care challenge
This Free S.O.S. Self-Care Challenge is for overwhelmed Mums who are struggling with the pressure of being the ‘perfect’ Mum, Wife and Homemaker and having little to no time for self-care!
…We all know that S.O.S is typically used as a distress signal…This Self-Care Challenge will replace your distress signal, S.O.S, with God’s response signal S.O.S 🕊️ Serenity. Over. Stress. (S.O.S.) 🕊️
Our Free 4-Day S.O.S Self-Care Challenge is a biblically-based mini course that helps stressed and “holds it all together for everyone else” Mums, form a new habit of focusing on their own self-care FIRST, and experience peace, calm and joy in the journey of Motherhood, Marriage and Life.
STOP THE 4 OVER’S
🌸 Day 1: OVERTHINKING
🌸 Day 2: OVERSLEEPING
🌸 Day 3 : OVERWORKING
🌸 Day 4 : OVEREATING
The S.O.S. Self-Care Challenge will show you how to Override the Overwhelm without Overcomplicating it and Achieve Serenity. Over. Stress.
By the end of this Challenge you’ll:
🌸 Achieve 🕊 Serenity. Over. Stress.🕊
🌸 Gain a Positive Self-Image
🌸 Feel Fabulous …
… with Christ at the Centre!